FEBRUARY 2010

INDUSTRIE – FEBRUARY 2010

AS AN INTROVERTED SISSY GROWING UP IN A SMALL TOWN IN CALIFORNIA, ALL I WANTED WAS JOE DALLESSANDRO HAIR AND WASHBOARD ABS. BUT I WORE "HUSKY" SIZED POLY PANTS AND HAD BIG SOFT 13-YEAR-OLD GIRL NIPPLES. AND BUCK TEETH.
MY PARENTS GAVE ME BRACES, BUT IT WASN'T UNTIL MY EARLY THIRTIES WHEN MY BETTER HALF MICHELE INSISTED THAT I START GOING TO THE GYM. HER REASONING WAS THAT IF I WAS GOING TO DRINK SO MUCH, I HAD TO BALANCE IT OUT.

WHEN YOU START, WORKING OUT WITH A TRAINER IS ESSENTIAL. OTHERWISE IT'S TOO EASY TO SUSPECT THAT YOU'RE PROBABLY NOT DOING IT RIGHT, AND GET DISCOURAGED. IF YOU WANT TO MAKE SERIOUS CHANGES, HIRE A TRAINER. I COULDN'T REALLY AFFORD IT BUT I PRIORITIZED. I WASN'T VERY SCIENTIFIC ABOUT CHOOSING TRAINERS. FRANKLY THE MAIN QUALIFICATIONS WERE THAT THEY HAD TO LOOK LIKE THEY KNEW WHAT THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT, AND BE SOMEONE PLEASANT TO HANG OUT WITH EVERY DAY. BECAUSE NO MATTER HOW TECHNICAL YOU GET, THE MAIN THING, THE MAIN THING, THE MAIN THING, IS CONSISTENT REPETITION.

AFTER YEARS OF ENJOYING OVERINDULGENCE, DISCIPLINE FELT EVEN BETTER. THE CHANGES WERE IMPERCEPTIBLE FROM MONTH TO MONTH, BUT AFTER A YEAR THINGS HAD CHANGED. BY THEN I WAS HOOKED. I NEVER HAD THE PATIENCE FOR SUPPLEMENTS, SO I JUST TOOK STEROIDS AND RECOMMEND IT HIGHLY. SURE THEY BLOATED ME FOR A WHILE, BUT AFTER I STOPPED, THE BLOAT WENT AWAY AND THE STEROIDS HAD GOTTEN ME TO ANOTHER LEVEL. IT WAS VERY REWARDING. AND I'D CERTAINLY TAKEN WORSE BEFORE.

I CAN REMEMBER AROUND 5 TRAINERS OVER AN 8-YEAR PERIOD. I'M AFRAID I WAS TERRIBLY PASSIVE AND TOOK LITTLE NOTICE AT THE TIME OF THE WEIGHTS THAT THE TRAINERS ADJUSTED AND THE EFFORTS THEY WENT TO TO BRING VARIETY TO OUR WORKOUTS. THERE'S REALLY ONLY ABOUT 10 THINGS YOU CAN DO, AND YOU JUST HAVE TO DO THEM OVER AND OVER. LIKE A DONALD JUDD INSTALLATION. CLASSIC, SIMPLE, PURE, REPETITIVE. 

I GUESS THAT WAS ABOUT 15 YEARS AGO.
WHEN I MOVED TO PARIS 7 YEARS AGO, I DIDN'T HIRE A TRAINER. I'M NO LONGER AS GOAL-ORIENTED, AND NEED MORE PERSONAL SPACE NOW. WORKING OUT HAS BECOME A NATURAL FUNCTION OF THE DAY. LIKE BRUSHING MY TEETH. AT THIS POINT, IT'S BECOME A COMBO OF DISCIPLINE, JOYOUS RELEASE, MEDITATION AND VANITY. IT GIVES ME A BREAK IN THE DAY TO ABSORB AND FORMULATE IDEAS. I LOVE THE WALK THROUGH THE TUILERIES AND UP RUE DE LA PAIX AND SEEING OPERA GARNIER COME INTO VIEW, WHERE MY GYM IS. I USED TO LOVE DANCING AND MUSIC NEVER SOUNDED AS GOOD AS IT DOES NOW THROUGH THOSE EARBUD HEADPHONES POUNDING BASS INTO THE PIT OF MY STOMACH AS I ENJOY THE SIMPLE PLEASURE OF FEELING PHYSICALLY ALIVE. I DO ONE LEG PART, 2 UPPER BODY PARTS, STOMACH AND STRETCHING EVERY TIME I GO, WHICH IS 5 OR 6 TIMES A WEEK. I TAKE MY TIME AND DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE WEIGHTS, I JUST DO WHAT FEELS GOOD. I DON'T FEEL THE NEED TO FORCE MY BODY THE WAY I USED TO.

I SMOKE, I DON'T PARTICULARLY WATCH MY DIET, AND I HATE CARDIO. IF I HAD TO RUN A MILE I'D PROBABLY PASS OUT IN A POOL OF VOMIT.
MY REGIMEN'S NOT PARTICULARLY CEREBRAL AND FAIRLY HYPOCRITICAL. OBVIOUSLY, I REPLACED THE ROMANTICIZED DETERMINATION TO SELF-DESTRUCT WITH THE FANTASY OF CONTROL AND IMMORTALITY. AND AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE, IT'S AS LOVELY AN INDULGENCE AS ANY.